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missingfred's Journal

25 February
Wesley knew what they were doing when he had agreed to Angel's plan. This would naught but slow Wolfram & Hart and all the nasty powers they represented. The Circle of the Black Thorn. What were they but another pretentious Masonic little boy's club? Like dozens of others, moving behind the scenes.

W&H would crush them like insects, and move on as though they had never existed.

But perhaps in some way, it would quiet the horrid sick thudding emptiness that had existed within him since Fred had died and Illyria had come to take her place?

Or perhaps it was only the fulfillment of a death wish of his own.

Either way, it scarcely mattered.

Some time later, dangling in midair gasping like a fish out of water as the demon's magic burned through him, holding him there, he realised he had already known.

This was how it was going to end. He had never even stood a chance.
He felt the moment when his blade was taken from him, when it cleaved his flesh. And then the net of magic was gone and he was laying upon the floor.

And she was there.
But no, it wasn't Fred. It was Illyria. Always Illyria, never Fred, not anymore. "You are mortally wounded." she had said, and even she seemed alarmed as he gasped out to her.

"Yes, I know."

It was an awkward moment, just the two of them, and it was as though his adversary was no longer present. Angel was no longer relevant, Wolfram & Hart, none of it. She was there somehow, in that cold blue husk. If only he could reach her one more time.

"Do you want me to lie to you now?" Illyria spoke, and although it had seemed preposterous, sacrilegeous even when Fred had first passed it made all the sense in the world to him now.

"Yes," he said, and died in Fred's arms, at peace with himself at last.

Pity fate never leaves such things alone. The world was not finished with Wesley Wyndam-Pryce yet.

a journal for the character Wesley Wyndam-Pryce of BtVS/AtS for use in cof_interzone